part 1 - Peter Begins
part 2 - Peter Part 2
.... and now he continues his telling .....
We had a great vacation in 2006. We spent a week with friends in Kanasikis Country. I saw this t-shirt that just seemed to describe my life so I bought it – “Life is Good”. After that Carol and I headed for Glacier and Yellowstone National parks. Yellowstone is such a diverse and unique place.
On the way home Carol suddenly got this really high fever that lasted all day. We stopped in this small town for night and after a good nights sleep she felt much better. Hmmmm. She had developed a problem with acid reflux which had prevented her from singing - truly her physical gift. In the fall something just didn’t seem right and she eventually went to the doctor to get checked out. An ultra-sound was scheduled for after Christmas as the doc thought likely she was having gall bladder problems. She had another bought of high fever in January 07 that kept her from substitute teaching, it lasted a week or so – no reason found.
The night before the doctor was to review the results with her, Carol came to me and said look at this – showing me something on the web about possible causes of unexplained high fever – liver cancer. I put that out of my mind (well not really – how can you – but I tried). I came home early as her appointment was the last one of the day – my cell phone rang at 5 PM. It was Carol – she said: “Peter, it is the worst possible news – there are two tumours in my liver”. I hung up and shrieked at God – “What are you doing?! How am I supposed to live without her? I can’t do this!!” We just clung to each other when I got home. What now?
People generally wanted us to take the most optimistic option – preliminary results; don’t really know exactly what it is; stay positive. Somehow we both just knew. Six months earlier we had downed tools at church and walked away – asking God to give us a new direction. Now it had arrived. We both had the sense that God had other options in mind besides a miracle cure.
A biopsy confirmed that it was indeed Ocular Melanoma spread to her liver. The oncologist talked to us for 2 hours but basically said – go home, keep on taking Tylenol, come back when the pain gets too bad. OM metastasis has no standard treatment options that are at all effective.
So how do you live when your timeline is short – measured in months?
I was reading in Ecclesiastes at the time and had bumped across some verse that seemed to be God’s message for us. They are still on the fridge and taped to my monitor at work. Check them out – Ecclesiastes 5:18-20 – “Make the most of what God gives”. The key word is today. Each day is God’s special day.
Carol kept a journal and this is what she wrote on February 16, 2007.
God, when you start thinking you are going to die it bowls you over. Then another strange emotion which is unnamed takes over. Acceptance and? So I ask you to keep my mind in order. Keep it on the track of wisdom, keep me always aware that you are in charge and that’s a very good thing. I love you Father. I need you every step of the way.
We started doing things together. First up was a trip to Palm Springs with our friends.
Wow, we had a great time visiting and exploring. Here we are in Joshua Tree National Park.
Carol’s family came over to visit. This is Carol with her niece’s baby daughter. Two people. Two ends of life’s journey.
We got organized and took the whole family off to Hawaii. We had always planned to do that – always seemed off in the future.
This was, I think, one of my life’s highlights – Carol would agree.
Just a super time to spend with our family. We had rented a house right on the beach about 45 minutes out of Honolulu.
We could relax and eat together, sun bath on the beach or go sight seeing.
We went snorkelling, sailing, visited Pearl Harbour, Waikiki beach, Diamond Head, Banzai Pipeline (home of 70ft waves).
We took in a luau one evening – I think it was my birthday actually.
I think you will agree – not bad looking after 27+ years of marriage - don’t you think?!
God did something amazing on this trip actually. As we were flying Carol turned to me and said – this might be a big mistake – I am really uncomfortable.
The tumours in her liver caused pain and swelling and sitting too long was not pleasant. Our bed in Hawaii seemed way too hard.
The amazing thing? Every night in Hawaii? She slept like a log and had no discomfort or pain AT ALL!! She was able to do everything we all did except the hike up Diamond Head.
I think I will leave you here for today – see you soon.
2 comments:
I am sorry I had to delete the previous comment because the poster was obviously not aware that Peter is telling us about something that has already happened, in this post, 2 or more years ago. Peter is not presently going through this.
Thanks Sara and Gregg for your inspiration to keep hope though.
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