"I don't know if I want to talk about this?""who's really entitled to talk about this stuff?"
"Should it really be an open discussion?"
"Isn't it each to their own?"
Me too, Us, yes and I don't know but I do know this ...
When I was a child my mom canned peaches every summer and she always put perfect halves into each jar, if a peach wasn't co-operating and it wouldn't halve nicely it went into the jam pot, she had high standards. In August I was at my parents for a fabulously relaxing holiday, since they live in the Okanagan I had to do it.... I got myself some peaches and I started canning. My mom was helping me and we cut those peaches any which way, small pieces, big pieces and odd shaped pieces, it didn't matter much. We started talking about the old days when it mattered what shape went into the jars and I joked with my mom that she'd lowered her standards. She said "well I guess I've gotten less picky as I've gotten older." We both agreed that there's nothing wrong with odd shaped peaches, we really don't care what their shape is because we know -they taste the same either way - really good. But the conversation continues on a different level. My mom taught me to halve the peaches, well it doesn't really matter to me so I teach my daughters that any shape is good, and in 20 years they will teach their daughters -just stuff it in the jar don't even bother with the stone. Ok so I don't really know what they'll teach their daughters and really it's just peaches but I hope you see the link to how we dress. How can us fashionable women keep from slipping down the worldly slope? We slowly, not so noticeably lower our standards and all becomes acceptable, everything if changed slow enough becomes normal. As Christians and Jesus followers what do we do? Where do we draw lines for ourselves so that we do not continue towards nothing, that is if it matters at all, maybe naked is ok? Are there really lines that can be drawn? I am not a line drawer so that'll be hard for me. What about church and the beach and at work and at the pool and running errands, do the lines move? How should a woman dress in light of living holy?
This topic needs discussion so please comment, if not just think about this question for yourself and your children and society as a whole.
Men you're also welcome to post your 2 cents. Because this topic can also affect you. What kind of standards do you think women should have?
photo by Dagobert
12 comments:
As a women of God I think we should dress modestly. And what I mean by that is, is breasts, butt crack, and belly should not be showing. ( of course if you have large breasts it's hard to "cover" them fully. Cleavage is okay, just no nipples about to pop out! LOL
These days I find all I can wear are dress pants! Jeans are just too low these days for a girl who has a bit of booty!
Dresses or skirts should be mid thigh or lower if you have kids or are older ( I was mortified as a kid/teenager& adult by a skantily clad mother; good body or not!! )
All in all, CLASS is what we should be wearing, but if yoga suits is what makes YOU FEEL good or pretty, then go ahead! Just make sure it's CLEAN! lol
And of course, let NO ONE tell you what size you have to wear to wear "that" if YOU feel you have a good body, then wear what you want to wear as long as all parts are covered properly! ALL shapes are beautiful to SOME ONE!!
"prettymomma" to 4 beautiful kids, 2 dogs, 2 cats and a hubby! It CAN be done! lol
Plus, my husband LIKES when I look "good" he takes pride in me, as I do for myself. And the kids are proud to "show" me off to their friends. ( can't tell you how many times Zack has "paraded" me around his class mates as his mom. ...but I wasn't allowed to "talk" to them LOL ( cute ) )
start changing your wardrobe to "class" now, and it won't "take as long" to get ready!
Since dress and modesty are mentioned in the Bible it must be a topic that God wants us to discuss. A question that comes to mind is What was a Godly woman in the church dressing like when it was addressed in Timothy? I can't imagine that they would have been showing a lot of skin. I would say cover up - no breast showing, or cleavage, or short shorts etc. Be sexy only for your own husband. Didn't God himself make clothes for Adam and Eve so that kind of says it all!
Amanda thanks for the fashion tips; CLASS is in, good to know and it won't take so long to get ready?..I'm in. And you are a prettymamma.
Interesting that both comments have a slightly different understanding of modest...hmm what could this mean?
Bible women were mentioned and it made me think, women of the bible times didn't change their dress code for the weather. We change drastically with weather. wool sweaters and turtle necks in winter to thin tank tops and skorts in summer. I don't think winter is an issue. Except if we were bible women we'd be very hot in summer because we'd probably have no skin showing but our hands feet and face, just imagine wearing your winter clothes in 30+...
The passage in timothy(2:9) I believe was/is telling women not to dress like prostitutes, I think most of us would agree that is a bad idea and would draw very negative results.
Good comments and stuff to think about. and I'd have to agree clothing is good;)
This is a hot topic for sure Cindy and I debate this issue every time I go shopping. Is cleavage ok? I have to admit that if someone has a mile of cleavage showing I have difficulty not being distracted by it. So maybe that is my answer, for me anyway. Do I want someone being distracted by my cleavage or listening to our conversation? I think I know the answer. Yet at the pool or beach, lots of cleavage is the norm. Is that ok? Not sure but I do know that I am not comfortable with mine showing which is a constant battle of adjustments through my time at the pool. Something to think about for sure. Then there is the whole issue of my boys being tempted as they grow older as they see so much flesh. Certainly they are responsible for where their mind wanders but is a society that promotes lots of revealed skin making it easier to... well, what is it making easier? Thoughts to ponder!
Oh and by the way. The day at the lake when you asked if I got a pic of your wardrobe mishap. Well, I didn't think of it until the other day and I looked through my pics carefully and well... I did! lol! Don't worry I will edit you out!
just to throw another thing to ponder:
in some area's it is the norm to be topless and wear thongs at the beach. And no one gives it a second thought... or glance..including teenage boys. Because that IS the norm there.
I had a friend in school who visited France every summer and one day we were talking ( now remember we are TWELVE! ) and she was mentioning her swimming in her white panties ( yikes! ) and no top! She had breasts! I was shocked! And if it was me , mortified! But to her it was normal, and she never gave it any thought, nor did her parents. Today, as a parent I think skin is not a big deal, and in our house no one but us adults have any "privacy" issues. No one seems to be ashamed of their body. I have TRIED to instill modesty, but to no avail! Clothes come off at a moments notice for bath time! And "flashing" towels after.
I think it is all society as well. I think the body is a beautiful thing and should not be "ashamed" of it. Peter has got a good grip as a man on his "eye" and will teach that to his children too. He says that as a man he can't even look down when talking to a women as she may think he was looking. So he looks UP! ( funny image! ) I think that is good advice to keep the "eye" in check.
But my main thing in this comment, is that the body should not be a shameful thing. we are who we are. It may not matter WHAT we wear; some of our bodies are voluptous wearing ANYTHING! We can't hide it. So we have to TEACH it. To respect it and it is NOT a dirty thing. ( I blame society and the perverted show's working on our minds all the time ) We are beautiful and created in God's image.
( that said, just want you to know I, myself would never go around topless ect anywhere as i am too shy! lol) - Just hope my views will make boys that are not obsessed with the flesh of girls! lol
Cindy you said that us guys could share our two cents. So here are mine.
We live in a sexually charged culture. Sex, lust, pornography are promoted as normal things for everyone to engage in (sex is excellent for married couples but as for the rest...). This shapes our TV shows, books, advertising, and how we dress. Does the way we dress simply reflect this cultural value?
Does this mean I advocate for strict rules? No - I am calling for conversation and prayer.
Prettymomma is right modestly is determined by culture. Some tribes in the jungle wear almost nothing and Old Colony Mennonites wear a lot more. Who is right? Who is dressed modestly? Culture determines the answer.
Though we have to remember that as Christians we challenge certain aspects of our culture. Sometimes the Mennonite clothing rules are oppressive to women and sometimes the lack clothing is a promotion of lust. We oppose oppression and lust as Christians.
One final thought on the biblical teaching. I believe it is saying there should modesty in the way people dress. However I don't think we are to return to biblical dress codes - after all that would mean men would have to start wearing dresses!
I may be of old school; however, here are my thoughts.
I believe that breasts/cleavage, butt crack & belly should not be showing. And it doesn't matter where we are - in church, work, or play. The following article expresses my views exactly.
http://www2.focusonthefamily.com/focusmagazine/parentfamily/A000000652.cfm
Also I believe as people in leadership we need to be especially conscious of how we portray ourselves (we are always being watched).
We also need to teach our own children how to dress modestly at a young age. If we allow skimpy tops/clothing when they are young it will be acceptable when they develop and mature. By our dress or lack of, we are causing young boys/men to lust in their minds - as the artcile states 'If a man lets his thoughts go, he dishonors God, his wife and that other woman — and he sets himself up for an ever-deepening struggle with sin.' Why do I want to be the cause of this man's sin when I could cover up and honor God. We never know if the man across the street or aisle is already struggling with pornography and we are fueling the fire.
We can dress modestly and still be fashionable.
I like the statement Anonymous made "Be sexy only for your husband".
The full website address for the article is:
http://www2.focusonthefamily.com
/focusmagazine/parentfamily
/A000000652.cfm
Somehow part of the address was cut off.
Martha, Ben, D and Amanda thanks for your comments.
http://www.oprah.com/dated/oprahshow/oprahshow_20081024_beautysecrets
It's all in the eye of the beholder... and the media helps tell us what to think too!
Let's try that again:
http://www.oprah.com/dated/oprahshow/
oprahshow_20081024_beautysecrets
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